Dining Experience

I have kind of talked about food and restaurants before, but the dining experience is so different that I think it deserves its own entry… I mean, service was my life for like 8 years so it is easy for me to critique the differences.

First, tipping is not the standard. You do not tip anyone – servers, bartenders, masseuses, nail people, etc. Of course, I am sure they would not protest if a tip was offered, but it is not expected (usually). You might think it was a good thing saving a little bit of money and I thought so too, at first, but now I am not so sure. Since servers do not work for their money, there is no service, literally.

Restaurants usually do not have hosts, but some nicer places have a greeter whom opens the door. Otherwise it is just the server who directs you to ‘seat your self’ and then gives menus. Once sat, there is not a 30 second greet or drinks to begin. Instead, we raise our hand and yell, “fú wù yuán” if we want someone to come to the table to take our order. Fú wù yuán is the general term for employee, and the word is used in many different contexts, not just for a server. In a restaurant, the job of the fú wù yuán is to take the order, take the money and drop off the food. Period.

The fú wù yuán only comes to the table if someone yells, “fú wù yuán”. When ordering, it is usually confusing if we try to order drinks first without ordering food, or if we ask for an appetizer out first (the separation is not standard in Chinese dining), so we have learned to just go with it and order everything at once. Then after everything is ordered, the fú wù yuán writes out a reciept and we pay first.

Then as each item ordered is ready, it is brought to the table instead of everything all at once, or appetizers out first, etc. Although it is really not a big deal, sometimes it is obnoxious when I am the last person in the group to get my food and it takes a while. Sometimes there is so much time between food deliveries that the first person is finished before the last person has food. On the other hand, when we eat at family style restaurants it is actually nice because it is like never ending food because dishes are constantly being dropped at the table.

That is the only time the fú wù yuán comes to the table – to take the order and drop off food. There is no 2 minute check back, dessert card presentation or pre-bussing. Luckily, I am not a very needy diner, but it can be annoying when I actually do need something because it can be difficult to find a fú wù yuán or get their attention.

Interesting Facts:

Restaurants do not have bottomless fountain drinks. I can either buy just a can or bottle of something, or we can buy a pitcher to share.

If I want a drink cold, I have to specifically ask for ice and a glass, otherwise it will come hot or room temperature. Chinese people believe that cold beverages with meals slow down digestion so they always drink hot or room temperature. A lot of times, they do not drink something with their meal, but drink something warm after the meal. And if you ever get sick, the Chinese always say that it is because you did not drink enough warm liquids.  

Water is not the free drink of choice either. Since we cannot drink tap water, any water at a restaurant is bottled water- warm or hot, unless otherwise requested.

A lot of restaurants do not have napkins, but they put wet naps on the tables, however, they charge 1 RMB for every wet nap used (hence why we carry our own tissues).

Chopsticks are the norm at all local Asian restaurants but a set of utensils can be requested. All western restaurants have regular silverware. Although, I have actually become pretty good with chopsticks – the wooden ones are the easiest, but I still struggle with the metal ones.

Rice is always the last dish served in a Chinese meal. Rice is eaten as a filler. Once the rest of the food is gone, they can eat rice if they are still hungry. When I order rice, however, I want it as my meal or with my meal, and it is really difficult to explain that we want it out before the end. 

“Western” restaurant refers to anything not Asian. We can eat just about anything around here. They tend to be more expensive than local restaurants, but they usually have fú wù yuáns that speak a little English.

Some local places have menus with both English and Chinese, but mostly, they have menus with a lot of pictures. Sometimes, I really have no idea what I am ordering… I just point to a picture and say, “ji ga” (this).

Vegetarianism is really difficult! Even if it is a dish of just veggies, it is usually cooked with some kind of animal byproduct, or has a sauce with a meat base (fish, beef or chicken stock, pork fat, fish oil). Although I am still practicing vegetarianism, I am probably the worst vegetarian at restaurants. I will eat food prepared with meat or meat products, but I won’t actually eat the meat itself. It is too much of a challenge for me to order things without meat – usually they do not know what I am asking for, or they don’t understand vegetarianism (because it really doesn’t exist in China), or they pretend like they know what I am saying and the food comes wrong anyway.