Gone Like a Fart in the Wind

I have said this from the start – people always leave. That is my life here in Shanghai. No one stays here forever. Most people are just passing through on their journey… visiting, stopping briefly for a couple weeks, a couple months, or maybe a couple years (if you’re lucky), but no one stays forever. Part of that is why I think Shanghai is so interesting exciting, unpredictable. It is incredible all the different people that I encounter and each with their own unique story, their own journey… but it is also the most depressing part.
I guess by now I should be used to it. I should learn to not get attached to people, but it is difficult! Just about every friend that I made when I first got out here has moved on. Some went back home, back to the states, or moved on to the next destination.
The story was no different for Chris. Chris was a guy I met a while back through a mutual friend and softball. We clicked instantly. He had a girlfriend, but that did not stop us from talking and getting to know each other. We were both in it to make friends and get to know knew people! He was awesome and probably my best guy friend since I came out here. Back when I went camping, he was one of the guys on the trip. It was the first time that I met his girlfriend, and although I instantly did not like her, I made peace with her for Chris’ sake.  He tells me that his girlfriend, Amanda didn’t much like me, but I don’t really care. I never did anything wrong and it is not my fault that Chris and I were better friends than her and I – she was stuck up and not the friendly type per say, but always nice to my face.
Anyway, I hung out with them all the time. I would go to softball with them, go out to dinner and bars and whatnot with them.  I always had a blast hanging out with Chris and our small group of friends – Amanda, Dante and his girlfriend Tina, Brandon and his yellow flavor of the week, and me.  So when Chris and Amanda told me they were moving back to the states, I was heartbroken. I knew that Amanda was unhappy living here from the start. She never wanted to come out here, but came from Chris and his job, but Chris really loved it out here!  He told me that although he did not want to leave, he was going to go back to the states and get his MBA, and most likely come back to Shanghai in a couple years. Amanda, on the other hand, has no interest in returning.
So anyway, just before they left, we had an entire weekend of fun to send them off. Chris’ brother, Joe, came into town on Tuesday night to spend the last week with them. Thursday night I met up with Chris, Joe and Amanda at Lao Beijing Restaurant in Jing’an for some Beijing duck. I have never had duck before but Beijing duck is supposed to be fabulous! At dinner, they bring the entire cooked duck right to the table, snap off the head, and slice off the meat for us to eat. Ironically enough, they pile the meat on a Donald duck platter. Surprisingly, the duck was actually pretty good. Or more the sauce and all the veggies that I piled on to the tiny piece of meat and my pancake was delicious! Anyway, we sat and talked, enjoyed some beer and lots of good food.
Friday night, I met up with them at Windows Too Bar in Jing’an. The majority of people that showed up for their going away party were co-workers, but I dragged Amy along with me and we hung out with the crew. After all the co-workers left, we took the party to Mural Underground. By this time, Chris and Amanda were already fighting, of course. This is what happens…Amanda complains the whole time about everything while Chris is having fun with his friends drinking. Then Amanda gets pissy about something stupid and starts fighting with him in the middle of everything. At first, Chris apologizes and tries to brush it off, but Amanda keeps pushing and pushing until Chris gets all riled up. Then when Chris gets mad and wants to leave, Amanda become all pouty because Chris the Bad Guy is making here leave when she is having so much fun (I hope that you can sense the sarcasm). I have watched this show over and over. So while we were all dancing and having fun at Mural, Chris and Amanda are still fighting in the corner, which eventually leads to their “break up” that lasts for thirty seconds.  Anyway, they leave, and Amy, Joe and I decided to make another stop of the infamous I Love Shanghai Lounge – my favorite bar, but I haven’t been since coming back. Turned out to be really lame, and considering it was nearly 4 am, we decided to head back to Chris and Amanda’s, but only after getting some of the most delicious street food. That night, Joe, Amy and I passed out on the futon in the living room.
The next morning, Chris woke up early and came and woke us up in the living room. We chatted a bit before beginning our “walk of shame” to the metro to head home. We had a busy day ahead of us, and a continued “going away party” for Chris and Amanda on the Pubcrawl party bus at night. We hurried home and got ready to spend the afternoon at Yu Yuan with Christina and Nick. It was super busy, but some local business man took us to this little get away on top of the shops that overlooked the city and the new PuDong skyline. That afternoon, we ate at one of my favorite places – New York City Deli (Amazing!) Before heading back home to get ready for the Pubcrawl.
We met up at the usual place – Brix on the Bund with Amy, Christina, Nick and Paul. Chris, Joe, Amanda, Dante, Tina and Brandon showed up a little later, and we had an absolute blast on the Pubcrawl. Per usual, we were the life of the party! We bounced around to four different bars before being dropped off at the final Chinese Disco Club. By the time we made it to the final club, our group was down to just me, Amy, Joe and Chris – the diehards. There was a live rapper at the club putting on a show, we grabbed a couple drinks (complimentary of the Pubcrawl) and danced our hearts out. At one point, I looked on stage to find Amy dancing with the rapper. Later she told me it was because she suddenly realized that he needed her on stage, so she jumped up.
After leaving the club, our hearts were set on getting street food and a massage although it was 4 am. Street food was a success; however, a massage was not. Looking back now, I am pretty sure it was a good thing we didn’t find a massage place open at 4:00 am because who knows what kind of massages we would have gotten! Than night, the three of us crashed on the futon again.
By the time the weekend was over. I was so sad! Chris was a good friend and one of my favorite party buddies! I spent more time out with him and at his apartment that weekend then I did at my own apartment, and I am glad that I got in all the extra time with him! I understand that people leave, but I think what makes me feel so bad about it is that our paths may never cross again and I may never see him again in my life, just as with all the rest. Friendship in Shanghai is like that... Just like a fart in the wind – intoxicating while it lasts then gone before you know it.